I Feel Suicidal…need Help..?

Question by Jonathan V: I feel suicidal…need help..?
It all started in the winter of 2006, horrible anxiety, depression that leads to suicidal thoughts…been to psychiatrists who put me in a mental ward. I got antidepressants and anti-psychotics over the years..They kind of “helped”…now I am trying to get off the drugs and yet again I find myself extremely suicidal, depressed and horrible anxiety, tired of living, tired of having chronic pain as well, since I also suffer from Chronic fatigue syndrome..a debilitating illness that probably caused all the mental problems…Now I feel lost and I told my mother I want euthanasia, I want to get a shot so I can just die…I am dosing off of Solian (Amisulpride) and I think that causes the suicidal thoughts…I don’t think anyone can help me…the only thought I have is that only euthanasia would get me out of this hell..Or else I should commit suicide but I lack the guts to do this..I feel ashamed, like I’m a nobody, and suffer from anxiety that debilitates me everyday…I see no way out of this..I don’t know what to do about it anymore..I don’t see much in taking psychotropic drugs again..I don’t trust these drugs anymore..I feel like dying..I need help..

Best answer:

Answer by Brianna
I’m so sorry. About everything. I think you should watch this..
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cETHTPeGvEc

Answer by Grace
I have been where you are. It does get better finally.

Your feelings are a symptom of your disease. They really make no sense. They are not reasons to die or things to hold on to.

From St. Francis “You cannot stop the birds from flying over your head, but you don’t have to let them nest in your hair.” Thought and feelings can be held onto or dismissed with love. Your choice.

If you don’t think you have this power, that also is a symptom of your illness.

Work to change your thoughts. Suicide is not an option. No one is going to kill you.

Of course, if you really want to die, volunteer to go kill some horrible person who needs killing, Volunteer for some dangerous mission. Let your death be worth something.

I know. You are too tired. That also is a symptom.

You don’t kill yourself over symptoms. Would you cut your nose off because because you have a cold and your nose is stopped up?

You do not need to be off drugs and out of treatment without a doctor’s advice. If they kind of helped, why get off? That doesn’t make sense!

You say you don’t trust these drugs, but when you are off them, you want to die! Think about that.

Does that make sense?

You probably need some drugs and some kind of talk therapy. A clinical psychologist or mental health counselor is the person to see for that. You may also need drugs, perhaps different ones from the ones you had. Finding the ones that work is not easy.
Go back to ones who helped before or call local hot lines or mental health centers.
Insight or cognitive talk therapy works also.

Of course, meds and treatment are not all.
Whoever diagnosed you with CFS should treat you also.

Do mild exercises. Yoga worked for me. Added aerobics later. Eat fresh fruits and vegetables. Try eliminating wheat. Drink lots of water. Go to bed and get up at regular times. If you have problems sleeping, just lie there and relax.
Look up relaxation training and breathing control. Fixes anxiety after a while.

You do not have the right to die now. Sorry, but that is it.

If you die, people will not be sorry. They will be angry and hurt. They may follow your example. Your asking someone to help you die does not make sense. Anyone who would help you would have a burden on their soul. Asking someone to do that is cruel. You are not a cruel person, so quit it.

Did you know that your suicide may convince others to do it. Do you want that on you?

And do you know exactly what will happen after you die needlessly. No one knows. You might be at peace or you might be in a worse place. Want to take that chance?

I do know how you feel. This letter could have been written by me some years back. I am ok now.
You can be also.

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