Best Friend Is Battling With Extreme Depression and Addiction to Oxycontin. How Do I Help Her Out of This Mess?
Question by Ben: Best friend is battling with extreme depression and addiction to Oxycontin. How do I help her out of this mess?
We are both seniors in high school currently. I could have never imagined my friend (I’ll use the name Jill) to be in such a deep mess.
Jill is also taking Adderall. She’s been prescribed it for ADD. At this point, all drugs are evil to me, but I’ll get on with it.
To put it lightly, her life sucks. As a young girl, her mother was never around. Her mother was always more interested in her current boyfriend than to pay attention to her. Jill always did her chores (and they were many in number) without complaint, and never really received much love from her adult figures. One day a few years ago, Jill’s parents were livid because she forgot to do her chores. They went crazy on her, and Jill called up her uncle and left with him, most of her things left at her old home. Jill and her parents haven’t talked since…but she misses her mother dearly. Her father is also an idiot failure. The only person who truly helped raise her was her uncle, and though he is nice, he is exceptionally close-minded. If Jill doesn’t do what he wants her to, he doesn’t support her, and that’s that. Especially when it comes to college. One of her life dreams is to become a artist. He wants her to become a teacher, and though she has been accepted into a wonderful art school, he won’t even bat an eye at it. He thinks it’s stupid. She doesn’t live with him currently, only in the summer, though he does support her as if she were his own child. He is like a very strict parent. He was born in and grew up in Japan, so maybe they have different values over there. Anyway, to stay in our school, she lives with a friend of mine, who surprisingly, knows absolutely nothing of her problems.
The most difficult thing affecting her life though is the fact that, while in seventh grade, a boyfriend she was with at the time went too far. She didn’t do what he wanted her to, so he raped her…and told her she was worthless and stupid. She believed him. And for some reason still does, though I am supportive and tell her she is worth so much to so many people. Even more wonderful, is that he is currently in one of her classes. She can’t even stand to look at him, but he seems to be attempting to reapear in her life. He’s apologized…he hasn’t changed. He’s a piece of crap. I am the only one who knows this much about her.
So one day Jill discovered her uncle’s Oxycontin pain pills. She started taking them, and realized that the numbness that came from them would allow her to escape the hell in her mind. Jill has been taking them for months now. She told me that she takes them every single day in the morning, and I can tell in the way she acts, her huge and bubbly smiles, that she is most certainly NOT normal. She is an AP student, and now the work she does….it sucks. The fact that she is taking both uppers and downers at the same time upsets me even more. She wants to quit, but she also doesn’t want to be depressed any more. I could never tell her uncle, he’s disown her and probably have a heart attack. But then if I try to get help, she can’t drive, and wouldn’t he have to find out somehow? She wants me to try and help her wean off of it. I know though that Oxy is one of the most difficult drugs to kick. She NEEDS help. She NEEDS rehab. But we have no money. I have no idea how to get it without him knowing. I am supportive and accepting as ever, but I really need some suggestions…
Best answer:
Answer by gardensallday
She can go in for treatment for depression, and not tell her parents/uncle about the drug abuse. Then deal with that issue privately with the psychiatrist or therapist. She can check if that information would be disclosed to her parents, but I’m pretty sure not. She needs counseling to deal with past traumas, or they will continue to haunt her. Her depression may improve quite a bit with therapy, so it would be better if she avoided medications and their attendant risks and side effects until and unless she is sure she needs them.
This is a big problem & she needs professional help.
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